The readiness question-are we prepared for relationships?
The lens principle : who we are determines how we see others
The mirror principle : the first person we must examine is ourselves
The pain principle : hurting people hurt people and are easily hurt by them
The hammer principle : never use a hammer to swat a fly off someone's head
The elevator principle : we can lift people up or take people down in our relationships
The connection question-are we willing to focus on others?
The big picture principle : the entire population of the world-with one minor exception-is composed of others
The exchange principle : instead of putting others in their place, we must put ourselves in their place
The learning principle : each person we meet has the potential to teach us something
The charisma principle : people are interested in the person who is interested in them
The number 10 principle : believing the best in people usually brings the best out of people
The confrontation principle : caring for people should precede confronting people
The trust question-can we build mutual trust?
The bedrock principle : trust is the foundation of any relationship
The situation principle : never let the situation mean more than the relationship
The Bob principle : when Bob has a problem with everyone, Bob is usually the problem
The approachability principle : being at ease with ourselves helps others be at ease with us
The foxhole principle : when preparing for battle, dig a hole big enough for a friend
The investment question-are we willing to invest in others?
The gardening principle : all relationships need cultivation
The 101 percent principle : find the 1 percent we agree on and give it 100 percent of our effort
The patience principle : the journey with others is slower than the journey alone
The celebration principle : the true test of relationships is not only how loyal we are when friends fail, but how thrilled we are when they succeed
The high road principle : we go to a higher level when we treat others better than they treat us
The synergy question-can we create a win-win relationship?
The boomerang principle : when we help others, we help ourselves
The friendship principle : all things being equal, people will work with people they like; all things not being equal, they still will
The partnership principle : working together increases the odds of winning together
The satisfaction principle : in great relationships, the joy of being together is enough.
